Phyllis Marie (Stafford) Hayes

A Snapshot of Phyllis

A TIME OF LOVE AND SERVICE / A TIME OF PEACEFUL REST

July 23, 1950  /  October 15, 2025

PARENTS

Loyce Jean Barnes & Lawrence Desota Irving

EDUCATIONAL TRAINING

Hillard High School – Bay City, TX

Bay City High School – Bay City, TX

Texas A&I – Kingsville, Texas

CHRISTIAN EXPERIENCE

Enterprise Missionary Baptist Church

Mt. Pisgah Missionary Baptist Church – Dallas

PROFESSIONAL CAREER

John Deere    |    STP    |    Deans Foods    |    EDS (23 Years of Service)    |    DART (10 Years of Service)

FAMILY

Marriage – Victor Hayes

Son - Phillip Hayes

Grandchildren – Blake Avery Terry, Jordan Terry, Kierstin Washington

Godchildren – Tanicka Crawford, Yara Copeland, Khiya Mullins

Siblings – Tammy Irving, Wanda Irving, Crystal Wyche

God-sister – Kimberly Milligan

Aunts & Uncle – Jeff Alexander (Noval), Annie Bratcher, Jennice Gallien, Wilada Green, Vernell McKinney (Leon), Eddie Miller (JC)

Life-long Friends – Beverly Adnandus, Bobbie Marshall, Ramona & Matt Trammel

Extended Oklahoma Family – Lori King

     Bonus Grands – Anthony King, Christina King, Jeffery King, Ashley Robinson

     Bonus Great-grands – Adonis, Gianna, Jayla, Niyah, Payton, Sabelah, Salanah, Tidus

     Additional Bonus Family Members - Daniel & Tiffany Acre and children Daniel Jr., Danielle, Draven, Dustin

PRECEDED HER IN DEATH

     Husband - Victor Hayes

     Daughter - Dedra Terry

     Parents - Loyce Jean Barnes (UL), Lawrence Desota Irving (Loreane)

     Stepfather - Clint Wyche

     Grandparents - Vera Lee Alexander (Jeff), Phillip and Lettie Green Sr., Roland Irving (Cora)

     Uncles - Donald Bratcher, KD Green, Phillip Green, Jr., Roland Green

     Nieces - Gay Green, Stacey Green

     Nephew - Jahavion Thrift

THESE TRIBUTES CAPTURE THE ESSENCE OF PHYLLIS' LIFE

FAR MORE VIVIDLY THAN ANY OBITUARY EVER COULD.

A Letter to My Mother

The greatest blessing God ever gave me was you. When I look back, you were always my biggest cheerleader. You never missed a single game. I can still see you in the stands — smiling, clapping, yelling my name — and that alone made me play harder. I just wanted to make you proud. Even as I got older, nothing changed. You were still my number one fan, always in my corner no matter what. I didn’t always make the right choices, but you never stopped loving me. You never gave up on me. Your love was steady — strong, forgiving, and unconditional. It was infinitely timeless, deep, and unshakable. You weren’t just my mother; you were my best friend. I could come to you about anything, no matter how big or small. You always listened, always cared, and always made me feel safe. I couldn’t have asked for a better mother — in my eyes, you were perfect.

Thank you, Mama — for every sacrifice you made, even the ones I never knew about. For believing in me when I didn’t believe in myself. For every prayer you whispered, every meal you cooked, every hug that made everything better. So much of who I am has come from you. You taught me strength, kindness, patience, and love. You showed me what it means to give without expecting anything in return. For every lesson, every laugh, every late-night talk, every football game we watched side by side — thank you. I’ll never forget our casino trips with you and Aunt Eddie. Those were some of the best times — laughing, talking, just being together. I’ll hold on to those memories for the rest of my life.

I find some peace knowing you’re no longer in pain — that your body and spirit can finally rest. But I miss you so much. Every morning and every night, I still find myself reaching for the phone, wanting to hear your voice, to ask how you’re feeling, to tell you I love you. Then it hits me that you’re not here, and that emptiness in my heart opens up all over again. It’s a hole I don’t think will ever close.

Mama, the selfish part of me still wishes you were here. I know God doesn’t make mistakes, but I sure wish He’d let me keep you a little longer. You were — and always will be — my angel. Now you’re watching over me from Heaven instead of here on Earth. Mama, I’ll be okay. It’ll take time, and it’ll never be easy, but I’ll carry you with me — in my heart, in my thoughts, in everything I do. You’ll always be a part of me.

Rest peacefully in His arms, Mama. Until I see you again. All my love,

Phillip

To Our Niece

Remembering you is easy, we do it every day. But missing you is a headache that never goes away.

See you later. Love,

Annie Marie  |  Eddie Percy

Forever In Our Hearts

Our Aunt Phyllis was a light in every room she entered — full of kindness, laughter, and a love for life that was truly contagious. She had a way of making everyone feel seen, valued, and loved — whether through her warm smile, her thoughtful words, or her quick wit that could brighten even the hardest of days. Her legacy of compassion and love lives on in every life she touched, especially ours. Her strength and resilience shone through in the way she faced life’s challenges with unwavering courage and optimism. No matter the circumstances, she always found a reason to celebrate — filling every moment with laughter and a zest for living. Her ability to find joy in simple pleasures inspired us to approach each day with gratitude and enthusiasm.

Though our hearts ache, we take comfort in knowing this is not goodbye — it’s simply ‘see you later’. Her love lives on in each of us, and we find peace in the promise that we will meet again.

Chelsea Goods  |  Nigel Goods  |  Kiersten Joe  |  Maya Menefield

In Loving Memory of Our Auntie

We always knew you were really our first cousin, but we lovingly called you “Auntie” — our favorite Auntie. We are so grateful for the special bond you shared with each of us. Your love, kindness, and radiant smile will be deeply missed. So many fond memories flood our hearts when we think of you — memories we will cherish forever. Losing you brings great sadness, but having the privilege to call you “Auntie” was a true blessing.

Rest peacefully we’ll see you later. With lots of love,

Angaleak  |  Britt  |  Dwayne  |  Gary  |   Gina  |  Loretha  | Patra  |  Rebecca  |  Theresa  |  Thomas  | Tracey

A Tribute to Our Beloved Sister, Phyllis Hayes

Phyllis Hayes was a woman of grace, strength, and unwavering faith. She possessed a quiet voice but a powerful presence — wise, intelligent, and full of compassion. Phyllis never met a stranger; her warm spirit and kind heart drew people in, making everyone feel valued and understood. She was a phenomenal wife and mother — devoted to her family and proud of the beautiful life they shared. Her love of football reflected her joyful nature and zest for life. Above all, Phyllis was a faithful servant of God who deeply believed in her Savior, Jesus Christ. Her life was a living testimony of faith, love, and integrity. As our sister, Phyllis was our protector, our confidant, and our guiding light. She stood by us with unwavering love and strength, always ready to lift us up. Though our hearts are heavy, we take comfort in knowing this is not the end — for we will meet again in God’s eternal presence.

Phyllis will be forever loved, deeply missed, and always remembered. With everlasting love,
Chrystal  |  Tammy  |  Wanda

In Loving Memory of Our Nanny

Nanny, you were our safe place and a constant source of love. Your laughter could fill a room, your advice always came from the heart, and your presence made every family moment better. You poured love into our lives — in both big and small ways — and the memories we have with you will stay with us forever. We are grateful for every hug, every conversation, and every time you showed up for us.

Our hearts are heavy, but we find comfort knowing your spirit lives on in the love you gave. We will miss you every day, but we will continue to carry your strength, kindness, and light within us — always.

With all our love,

Briana | Bubba

A Tribute to Mama Phyllis

When I first met Mama Phyllis, it was early one Saturday morning years ago. I had driven up from Oklahoma to see Phillip on a Friday night. I was so tired that I couldn’t drive home, so Phillip told me it was okay to spend the night and leave in the morning.  Well, that following morning we woke up and all I heard was, “Phillip Avery, get that girl out of my house!” I was scared to death!

Over the years that followed, I got to truly know Mama Phyllis. We would meet her, Aunt Eddie, Percy, and Phillip at the border — at Winstar. What a time we would have! Of course, Mama would always say, “Well, I left my contribution.” And I’d say, “Oh, Mama, me too!” Month after month we’d meet up again, leave our “contributions,” and laugh about it every time. Seeing Mama Phyllis and Aunt Eddie win — the smiles and glow on their faces — are memories I will always hold dear in my heart.

When Phillip moved to Oklahoma, we’d visit as often as we could. Mama knew my favorite place to eat was Babe’s, and she’d always ask, “How about we eat at Babe’s tonight?” — a woman after my own heart!

We’d sit in her room and watch what she called “the idiot box” all night long. When Dateline came on, something about that man’s voice would creep me out, so I’d sneak over to her side of the bed and change the channel. But you couldn’t fool her — she’d peep at me with one eye open and smile. She knew.

When my own mother passed in 2020, Mama Phyllis and Aunt Eddie came to the funeral. Mama Phyllis looked me straight in the eye and said, “It’s okay — I’m your mama now.” I took that to heart. She was my mama too, and Phillip had to share.

The last few years were hard to watch. We asked Mama to come live with us in Oklahoma — even tried to bribe her with all the casinos around. Her answer was always, “We’ll see.” Finally, a few weeks ago, Phillip told her she was moving — and she agreed it was time. We told her to relax, that we’d take care of everything. And we did — and she did.

When she got to Oklahoma, she’d stroll around the house looking so cute. Our hearts were full — and so was hers. She seemed relaxed, happy, and at peace. Phillip and I were by her side when she passed, holding her hand. I want you all to know — she was at peace.

Mama, we will miss you dearly, but just know — we’ll be okay.

Lori

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